You get mad, you get strong. Wipe your hands, shake it off. Then you stand.

This just in... aside from marriage and blood relationships, everyone is replaceable. Disposable. Well, to some people. How sad. I think I've finally decided that I don't care how people look at me, I don't buy it. There are some friendships, etc that just can't be replicated. Period. I understand now (and am willing to admit) that I believe so. Why am I so nostalgic? Because that's just who I have always been. I'm loyal to the core, and sometimes it's a fault as well as a strength. I'm amazed by how much things change once you really start to become an adult (not a legal adult, an actual adult with real life responsibilities and maturity). The people who are in my life now, the people who are really there for me in the ways that count are not the people I thought they would be 2 or even 12 months ago. And in my heart of hearts I believe there are a select few who would still be there anyway. I think it also shows you that people surprise you for the better. My daddy, grandparents, babies... irreplaceable. J is my best friend and my husband, irreplaceable. Seems like people get married with an expectation that they'll get divorced at some point and that's really sad. Irreplaceable. Indisposable. I thank God for that because I don't know how I'd've gotten through the last year without him loving me even when I've been at my absolute worst or weakest.

 It was all about my friends in high school and I'm embarrassed to say that my family life suffered for it... looking back, I regret that. Only three (maybe four, but not if I'm honest with myself) people I was close with in high school are still close to me now... which is rare. But hey, if I made it 6 years post-high school and STILL have one friend who is there for me whenever I need her and keeps in touch on a regular basis (even though we both have busy schedules)... how is that in any way a loss? That's one real friend. I'm lucky enough to have a few. Of course, there are people I had nothing to do with in high school who I talk to on a regular basis now that we're all grown, living on our own or married and living in different states. Life is funny that way. Having your own family (whether it be husband and wife plus or minus babies, mom and babies, dad and babies) changes your priorities and I'm grateful for that. My birthday is 2 days away and my idea of fun.. is baking my grandma's red velvet cake recipe and snuggling my kiddos. I'd prefer having my love here, but he's taking care of us and I understand. Actually- TRUTH. I'd rather be in TX right now. Maybe not forever, but definitely for now. I'm now actively looking for a home for at least 2 of my Jack Russells... if you know anyone who is interested, please email me.

I digress. lol.

Be your own best friend. Believe in yourself and don't rely on another person to tell you what you think you need to hear. Just do it. Own your inner strength. Stop beating yourself up and think positively... anything else is a waste of energy you could be using to try something new, do something good or help someone who needs it. Life is too short. Too short not to love and cherish the people who ARE in your life. It's a marathon... not a sprint. We all stumble, it's forcing yourself to get back up, keep calm and carry on that makes you strong. :)

Life changes so quickly. Even when everything seems to stay the same, it's different. I cannot get over how much my kids are growing and changing. Emily is (finally) actually talking and telling us what she wants. Kegan's vocabulary (and obvservations) are off the charts! He'll be 4 in 2 months and I cannot wait to get him involved in t-ball or some sort of martial arts. Em and her bff might start ballet together (if it works out that we're here).

Last night I went to the store and bought a tv stand. It was huge and weighed a ton... my friend kept my kiddos and I got it, loaded and unloaded it and put it together by myself in under an hour. Then moved our tv, game systems, etc. and put it all together. I was feeling pretty proud and independent! My hubby has just always been the one to take care of those things and I did it! I have to be honest, Kegan was with me till I got ready to put the tv, etc on the assembled stand and I was resisting the urge to sing the "Dora the explorer: We did it!" song. haha.

Garage sale in 2 weeks! It's gonna have to be a big one because if we PCS, there's a weight limit that I'm certain we would DOUBLE. lol. We just have so much stuff we don't use or need... I'll end up donating or giving some of it away but since we'll have to replace some other things (move or no move), I'd rather get some money back on some of it. Gym time... my head hurts and I'm exhausted. I had an allergic reaction to an antibiotic last week (and one of the side effects was tendinitis)... no thanks. So I'm grateful NOW that I don't have to give up my running every day!

Hope everyone has a good week!